Dragapella Sensations Kinsey Sicks bring Oy Vey in a Manger back to SF.

Recently, I had an opportunity to catch up with the Kinsey Sicks, America’s favorite Dragapella Beautyshop Quartet, as they prepare to bring a newly-gilded Oy Vey in a Manger to the Herbst Theatre on Nov. 26.

(Bay Times) Bringing Oy Vey in a Manger home to SF is a chance to return to your roots, touch up your roots and enjoy home-crowd rooting. What is your favorite thing about bringing the show home to the little jewel-box shtetl on Van Ness, the Herbst Theatre?

(Rachel) Undoubtedly, it’s the chance to sleep with journalists named Mike in exchange for favorable coverage. Do you know of any?

(Winnie) Oh, Rachel, don’t remind me of painful liaisons with San Francisco journalists. Not since Leah Garchik broke my heart. I mean, she said she cared. But did she ever spend the night? Or even stay to snuggle? Sorry, I can’t talk about this.

(Trixie) For me, Oy Vey in a Manger is a holiday tradition, like eggnog, the giving of presents and after-show trysts with available singles or unfaithful husbands with disposable income.

(Trampy) I’m feeling sentimental about spending what could very well be our last Christmas in our manger, sweet manger. And unhappy I might have to spend it with real estate speculators. Come to the show - you’ll understand.

Winnie, what beauty tips can you give lovely lesbeterians who want to look as bright as you?
(Winnie) Isn’t the lesson of the holiday season that it’s not what’s on the outside that counts, but what’s on the inside? That’s why I recommend a strict regimen of prune juice and regular colonics for the duration of the season. It improves my outlook - and my inlook - plus it helps the Kinsey Sicks keep tempos up while on stage.

Rachel, your favorite two words - “Eat Me” - aren’t just a phrase, but a way of life. What (or whom) is your pre-show meal?

(Rachel) Without a doubt Rush Limbaugh. You are whom you eat, and I’m working on becoming tasteful and understated like Rush. Plus, if I snack on him before the show, I know there will be plenty left to snack on afterwards.

Any new tunes?

(Rachel) A whole bunch! But what’s the point of spoiling the surprise - unless it sells tickets? Okay, with that in mind, here are some of them: “Lusty The Snowman”; “The Twelve Steps of Christmas”; “Betty White Christmas”; “Satan Baby”; and more. It’s not the same old Kinsey crap - it’s new Kinsey crap!

(Winnie) Yes, I’m very excited about all the new songs this year. And just when I’d thought we’d exhausted every means of stamping out holiday cheer!

(Rachel) Actually we have a whole bunch of new material - new, and revised songs, many changes in the script, all designed to be more topical. Kind of like an ointment, although WE can be inserted internally. Talk to me after the show for more details.

Parting shout-outs?

(Rachel) A Shout out to our understudies: Sharron Angle, Christine O’Donnell, Meg Whitman and Carly Fiorina. Thank God they’re all still available!

(Trixie) And to George W. Bush for the recent release of his very expensive toilet paper. Marvelous job, honey!

(Winnie) I’d like to shout out to all of you entertaining out-of-town family this Thanksgiving. You know you will have run out of polite things to say to each other by bedtime on Thursday. So you might as well bring them all to see us at the Herbst on Friday. After all, in the Herbst space, no one can hear you seethe.

Kinsey Sicks’ Oy Vey in a Manger on Nov. 26 (Friday) at Herbst Theatre, 401 Van Ness Avenue, San Francisco. Tickets ($25 to $35) call (415) 392-4400 or at CityBoxOffice.com.